God blessed the broken road…

On one knee, Ben looked at me with love-filled eyes and asked, “Amanda, will you marry me?”

Things had been getting serious, especially since my surgery. Ben had caught up to where I was emotionally…he had gotten more serious. I have known he was my soul mate since our second meeting. It was with a church group for singles at a bowling alley. He had my heart then, but is more of a cautious mover. We balance each other well that way.

But even then, never would I have thought a love like this possible. Love so alive. Values so aligned. Hearts so intertwined.

Hours and hours of conversation – discovering similarities, differences, strengths and weaknesses…no topic off-limits. The darkest hours and corners of our lives open for discovery and sharing and healing.

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Last week Ben asked if I would have lunch with him on Thursday of this week. We have lunch regularly and I didn’t find it odd that he asked so far out because he was to be out of town for work Tuesday and Wednesday and we wouldn’t see one another. He mentioned having lunch on the river.

Wednesday night I let him know lunch might be compromised due to a work scheduling issue. He seemed really disappointed and I could tell meeting for lunch was important to him, so I told him I would work it out so I could be there.

This morning it rained…poured down rain. When I was on the way to meet Ben, I called him and he directed me to meet at his house for lunch instead of the river. Upon arriving, I found he had a whole picnic lunch laid out on a blanket in the living room. It was detailed with all of my favorite foods…foods he wouldn’t normally have at his house. As I walked closer, I saw he had a picture of the beach on the big screen television, sounds of waves crashing through the surround sound and candles for ambiance. It was so incredibly romantic.Image

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Romance…something I didn’t think I deserved two years ago. My past is ugly. I have done and participated in many things I am not proud of. I have been a victim of hurts and pains. And I most certainly wouldn’t allow myself to get close enough to anyone to allow them to romance me. But with Ben, I’ve never had that wall or distance. It has always been natural and unforced and comfortable.

After we were done eating an amazing lunch, we decided to sit on the sand bar (a.k.a. the couch). As I got comfy, Ben brought me a gift wrapped box. My response was “Whoa…is it ‘Give-Gifts-to-Amanda-Week’?”Image

See earlier this week, on Sunday to be exact, we were having lunch with the kids after church and Ben gave me a beautiful Open Heart necklace. It was a great dry run. My 10 yr old son, Brandon thought Ben was proposing to me and immediately ordered him to get on one knee. It was hilarious and opened a door of communication that led us up to today’s proposal.

 When I opened today’s gift, I found a box of my favorite perfume. I haven’t purchased it for so long because it is ridiculously expensive. I was excited and thanked Ben and opened the box smell it. As I did this, Ben grabbed the box out of my hand and turned it upside down and out fell a ring box into his hand.

On one knee, Ben looked at me with love-filled eyes and asked, “Amanda, will you marry me?”

Looking into his deep and genuine eyes, I replied…I had to think about it.

Ha…ok that’s a joke. Of course I said YES!!! And then I asked where my perfume was! Okay another joke…kind of. It was a little bit later I asked 🙂

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My relationship with Ben is like nothing I have ever experienced before. Everything we do feels like we are doing it for the first time. And I’ve allowed Ben to hold me accountable in my journey. I’ve allowed him to challenge me in areas of my spiritual walk. He has helped me learn discipline in areas I still struggled with. He has been a partner in my journey that has grown and matured me.

God put Ben in my life when I was walking a path being content in the blessings God had already provided.

That broken child I was two years ago has been built into a strong child of God. He has made me pure and washed me white as snow.

So when I marry Ben – my soul mate, my best friend and the sexiest man I know – I will do so in a white dress that symbolizes the pureness of my new life in Christ and the pure relationship between God and I, and between Ben and I. And we plan to marry in our church – the place we met, fell in love and have grown in our journey. And I will do it not feeling shame for my past failures, but joy for how God has blessed the broken road that has led us to one another.

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Ben raising his arms in victory “She said yes!”

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10 thoughts on “God blessed the broken road…

  1. So sweet and you so deserve it!!! You know this and have known this is the man you are destined to be with. You made steps of regret in the past but they ALL got you to where you are now! So happy for you and I am excited beyond belief for your new life together;) stefanie

  2. So freaking awesome! I know exactly how you feel. Meeting Tim has been the most soul refreshing experience of my life. I can’t wait to marry him next friday! I hope you and Ben would come and join us in our nuptials!!

  3. Awesome story. Thank you for sharing in your romance, growth, and the spiritual values between the two people so much in love. God Bless both of you. Lori P

  4. God is good and will be with you on your new journey through life, I am so very pleased and happy for the both of you. Put God first always and you’ll both have the most amazing life. With love always

  5. Amanda, I am so happy for you & Ben. I know you both will continue to grow more in love as time goes on. What God has started to do in your lives, He will be faithful to complete it until the day of Jesus. (I am not so good in quoting Scripture, so I am paraphrasing this).
    .

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